ENDER'S GAME - (4)

Yeah, this is about how I felt after seeing the movie.   The book, for me, was mostly interesting because what Ender was doing contrasted sharply with what Peter and Valentine were doing on Earth.  Without two storylines to bounce around there is only Ender and a watered-down view of what Battle School looked like.   And, yes, it's watered down.  They try to show it but this is Hollywood.  They couldn't (or wouldn't) get the kids to act like the terrifying little monsters they had been trained to become.   Not that the actors themselves couldn't.  I know for a fact that Haille Steinfeld,

This girl.  The one girl.  Who's job was to be "The Girl" and push a button.

was amazing in TRUE GRIT and could have been amazing in ENDER'S GAME, too, had the script allowed for it. Ender's Game was written pre-Hunger Games and during the tail end of the Cold War.  Orson Scott Card was part of the disenchanted rising generation and the whole point of the book to to examine the senseless waste of the military industrial complex and to prove that one doesn't have to be a certain age to excell and to know when things are wrong.  By focusing exclusively on Ender but without actually showing the true harshness and isolation he experienced his whole life, most of the film ended up silently supporting the status quo.   Sure, there was some heavy-handed moralizing at the end but it couldn't make up for the 90 minutes of glorious tedious war we just saw beautifully rendered.

Anyway, everyone gave it their best but the movie ended up feeling a lot like the first Harry Potter movie -- playing out more like a highlight reel than an actual story.

THE WORLD'S END -- (9)

Obviously I enjoyed this film, but I knew I would before I went.  SHAUN OF THE DEAD is the only zombie movie I have ever seen on purpose. (It still gave me nightmares but at least they were funny nightmares.)  HOT FUZZ is quite possibly the greatest movie ever made about excessive police action in small English villages.  So, when THE WORLD'S END opened, I went right out and saw it.   I quite liked it, too.  But I am reluctant to write a review because there are piles of jokes I don't understand. I don't frequent British pubs and have never seen any sort of body-snatcher/pod-people movies which seems to be a lot of what this movie was built on.

But my sister Caroline keeps bugging me to review it so here's what I managed to take away from the film:

Pegg plays a guy named King who, in high school, had an entourage.

The names of these characters, from left to right, are Chamberlain, Prince, King, Knightly, and Page.   They were the royal court of the school, the town, and all of life was in front of them.

Twenty years later, King wants to get everyone together again to do an epic pub crawl that they had failed at once before.

As you can see, everyone has moved on with life - except for King, who is an absolute mess.

This basically sums up his character.

As the movie goes on there is a map,

drinking,

a lot of time spent in bathrooms,

general confusion,

the discovery of a terrifying blue substance,

something called a "marmalade sandwich"

explosions,

and Nick Frost getting to play against type and kick sixteen kinds of booty in a LOT of bar fights.

"I've got my pink shirt and five shots of tequila - LET THE BEATINGS COMMENCE!!"

And if that's not awesome enough for you, there is (as one can expect from these lads) a lot of stuff about growing up and friendship and taking risks, free will and accepting the imperfections in yourself and others.

So, basically, it's less scary than SHAUN OF THE DEAD, has fewer potty-mouthed priests than HOT FUZZ, and manages to bring a lot of humanity (and a twist!) to the pod-people genre.  

PACIFIC RIM (8)

Awesome things about PACIFIC RIM:

1. Giant Godzilla-monsters

2. Giant robots

3. Giant robots fighting giant monsters

4. Ron Perlman

5. Rampant destruction.

6. Watching giant robots fight giant monsters.

7. Leaving the theater after watching a big loud movie about giant robots fighting giant monsters and seeing the dark cloudy sky filled with the silent flashes of 527 lightning hits in Las Vegas (so far!) tonight.  It was almost more amazing than a big loud movie about giant robots fighting Godzilla monsters!

Well, okay, maybe it was cooler...

Questions I had after watching PACIFIC RIM:

1. Why is simply punching a giant monster considered an effective form of combat when the monsters have tough thick hides, bony potrubances to protect their brains, and highly-graspable blue glowing dangly-bits popping out of their bodies randomly?  Could we come up with a strategy that isn't "Punch It In The Face Till It Stops"?

"Anyone?  Anyone? I'm looking directly into the camera at you..."

2. Why does Raleigh spend the whole movie yelling condescending commands at his co-pilot, Mako, when they are MIND-MELDED TOGETHER??

"OBVIOUSLY I know what you are thinking. I have been in a "neural handshake" with you for three hours.
 The answer is still no."

3. Is it a rule that all Russians be blond and technologically backward?

"Da!"

4. How do giant robots designed to fight aquatic monsters keep running out of air for the two humans inside?

"Help!  I'm dying from lack of oxygen, which is a problem the dudes at NASA managed to solve in the 60's!"

5. If someone is arrogant or disrespectful, is there any way for that character to redeem himself which doesn't involve dying?

"Well, for me right now.... No. No there isn't.  Also, I look like a Ninja Turtle."

6.  If Japan (finally!) built a giant robot, do you think they would name it Coyote Tango?

Seems legit..

and finally

7. Why did the giant robot go into combat with the giant monster and ONLY use a sword when there was NO other option?

"When you make me VERBALLY REMIND you that we have a SWORD is when I really start to question mind-melding as a
combat tool...."

But, giant robots fighting giant monsters. So... who cares?  :)

"The apocalypse has been canceled.  I'm afraid we had a bit of a mix up on the calendar so it will be re-scheduled at a later date.  Thank you so much for your attention."