REAL STEEL -- 5

I am not a disinterested observer most of the time.   The most notorious example of this is when I went to the dollar theater to see DRUMLINE with my friends.  I was so involved with the movie I shushed the friends who were openly mocking the movie beside me.  They, in turn, began to mock me as well, which is only natural since we were A) at the dollar show B) watching DRUMLINE.

I bring it up to say that REAL STEEL has some good action sequences which I totally got into in spite of the logical inconsistencies.  This movie is a Steven Spielberg-produced joint about crappy absentee dads (a standard Uncle Morty theme) in a world where boxing robots are easier to hack than Ipods and perfectly useful robots are thrown into junkyards with amazingly poor security.  You know, because no one would ever use a giant robot to do anything bad with.   Naw, in this world, it's much more satisfying to physically punch people in the face with your own fists, 11-year-old boys can walk un-accosted into terrifying underworld locations without fear, and if you just ask your robot to stand up, he will.  Also, a good boxer will beat a computer program every time, even if he can't win a street fight.

So either Texas in the future is a really nice crime-free, sunshine-filled place, or the Texas Rangers have the deadliest robots on the planet which they use to control a militarized Utopian society, providing professional boxing matches to the repressed population as entertainment by providing a cathartic release of the terror they live with on a daily basis.

Since we are talking about Texas, I think the most likely answer is "Both."  ;)

PRIEST -- 4

This film is on the verge of being fairly cool.  I can see the graphic novel underpinnings of this movie and I can also see how the book would be much better than the film.

I'm not to saying they didn't try.  It's plain to see the work put in to make everything as beautiful as possible.  I liked Paul Bettany (pictured here on the movie poster), I liked Carl Urban, I liked Maggie Q, I liked the lighting and the sets and the ridiculous motorcycles.  However, one still runs into the fact that A) it's a western and B) Cam Gigandet is in it.  Also, all the cheap one-liners that are so easily digested in graphic novels completely mess up the flow of a movie. I am willing to believe Paul Bettany is a man who has dedicated himself to vampire hunting, left his family, made vows to God and Church, wreaked such epic damage that he single-handedly stopped a war, and then was left to shovel coal in a basement while being shunned by the society he saved.  I totally buy that.  What I do not accept is that such a man will constantly be making arrogant and/or pompous statements in order to prove his awesomeness.  It just doesn't make sense.

Things which also don't make sense:  how exactly in 3,000 years of history has no one ever turned a human into a vampire?   And why, with all the possible fashion choices available in the future, did women decide to wear tiny dusty bonnets inside the house??  Ridiculous.  Those things are to block blistering sunshine not to rock your baby in.

Anyway, everyone important survives the end of the film and there is a big obvious set-up for a sequel.  Equally obvious is the total absence of demand for such a sequel.   Shame, really.  I'm all for automated confessionals and cruciform shuriken as long as the heroes who use them get to BE awesome instead of talking about it.

MONEYBALL -- 7

It occurs to me that most of the movies I see get a 6 or 7 rating.  Since this is statistically unlikely this means all the films I manage to view are of a consistent quality or I just like movies.  But, it probably only means I'm too lazy to really figure out a different score for them.

MONEYBALL, however, totally deserved a 7.  It was really interesting.  They managed to make a book about statistics into a movie about a guy who has never lived up to his potential and what happens when he stops following everyone else.

I really related to Pitt's character because I myself tend to freeze up under pressure.  I have blown more auditions and competitions than I like to remember, and even something as basic as a drivers test at the DMV had to be failed multiple times before I stopped caring enough to relax and just do the right thing.  In the end Billy Beane chose to do the right thing for his team by facing the truth the numbers offered, and did the best thing for him personally with his family.

Truth is truth, and right is right, and often truth and right don't look anything like what one expects them to.  MONEYBALL doesn't say that but just charges ahead and shows you what it looks like to be a success, even when one is a failure.